Rap Battle
by IdiotWithNoEmailAdress
Summary: Riku and Sora get in a rap battle. This is a really crappy summary...
1. Yo, Yo, Yo

Kurama/Disclaimer: The Idiot owns nothing except the wannabe rapper's rap.

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"I can't do this, man." Sora splashed his face with water. He looked at his reflection through his fingers. 

Riku spun him around by the shoulders. "Don't talk like that, man! You can do it! I believe in you!" They looked into eachother's eyes for a few saconds before Riku pulled Sora into a tight hug. "I love you, man!"

Sora stared at a closed bathroom stall. "Riku, I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I.. I... I... I...Muph!" He pushed past Riku into the stall and threw up in the toilet. ...Or it would've gone in the toilet if somebody wasn't sitting there.

The guy looked down at the yellow gooey stuff in his lap, then back up at Sora. "What the f-"

"Sorry, man!" Sora shut the stall and ran out the bathroom.

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"Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, y-yo, yo."

"BOO!" The crowd booed at the rapper's sad attempt to rap.

"Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo-"

A gunshot was heard before the rapper fell off of the stage. The crowd cheered.

Sora, who had been watching from behind the curtain, burst into tears and ran to Riku. "I can't do this, man! They're gonna bust a cap in my ass, man!"

Riku comforted Sora, patting his head awkwardly. "Don't worry, man," he said calmly, "nobody's going to bust a cap into your ass. See? The bouncer is taking the guy that did it out."

"Fo real?" Sora took a closer look at the bouncer and started crying again. "No he's not, man! He's shaking his hand! And giving him a medal! ...And some chocolates! And a pony! Waa!"

"Uh, yeah, man, that's niceHey do you think they took out the body, yet?"

Sora peeped over the edge of the stage. "No, man. It's still there."

"Oh, okay, man. I'm gonna go... poke at it, man. ...And by the way, good luck, man." Riku pushed Sora through the curtains on the stage.

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A/N: Soo that's the end of the first chapter of this really shortstory. Review. Yo. 


	2. Sora's Rap

Kurama/Disclaimer: The Idiot owns nothing.

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Chapter 2: Sora's rap 

Sora stared in horror at the crowd of angry people. His opponent was a pale, skinny boy with a hoody on.

After a few minutes of staring, Sora deided to get it over with. He looked into the crowd for support.

Riku looked up from his body poking and gave him a thumbs up.

Sora smiled shakily as he scanned more of the audience. He spotted a cute redhead girl that was smiling a him.

Sora turnd to the crowd, newly motivated. He had his friend's suport and not only did the redhead smile at him, but she was also fingering a pistol.

"Yo, yo, yo!"

The crowd looked just about ready to jump him.

"Yo, when I say 'You're a' you say ho! You're a-"

"HO!"

"You'e a-"

"HO!"

Sora gaped at the audience. "...What?" His eyes teared. "That's so... Hurtful!" He ran off the stage in tears.

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A/N: If you cared, the redhead was Kairi, but she's not important. ...Not that she's ever important! (high fives a fellow Kairi hater) Review! 


	3. Riku's Rap

A/N: RETARDcupcake- Busting a cap in someone's ass is another way of saying that they will get shot... In their ass. Or just get shot.

Umi-One word: Retufiklubokolo

Kurama/Disclaimer: The Idiot owns nothing.

Chapter 3: Riku's rap

Riku looked up from the body (which had a lot of holes now) to see Sora running off the stage crying. He looked longingly at the body, but went to his friend. "What happened, man? The last thing I remember is calling some jackass a ho and now you're crying."

Sora opened and closed his mouth. "Eeehh..." he squealed and ran away.

The crowd pushed Riku on the stage when it was his turn. His opponent was a fat man.

Riku saw a cute redhead and waved to her. His eyes widened when she waved back with a pistol.

"Yo, yo, yo! I'm in the hisouse!" he screamed to the crowd. He went to the fat man and got in his face. "I am smart. You are dum. So why do you come? And eat a plum? You bum. You are a chum."

The fat man bumped him away with his stomach.

"I hate you. You smell like poo. Why don't you do some tai ku (spelling, please.) You stop smoking to chew. A cow go mooo. And remember, I hate you.

"So go take a bath. And do some math. Chath, lath, wrath, at... Other stuff that rhymes with math.

"I know what you did last summer. It was a bummer... I made up a word called lummer. Cause I could dp that, you... ummer!"

"OHHH..." the crown murmered.

"Brains is what you lack. Yo mama name is Mack. You put cocaine in a pack. Why you always talking smack? So go sniff your crack."

"HE GOT YOU WHIPPED!" some random guy yelled.

"Lose weight like Kary Mate (come on, people... Figure it out.) Your children were born in a lake. I'm going to bake a cake. PEACE!"

The crowd cheered as Riku walked off the stage.

The fat gut stopped him. "Yo, wheres you goin?"

"I _said_ I was gonna make a cake." He kept walking.

"Hey! I's is not done wit yoos!"

Riku turned around. "_What_?"

"...Can I come?"

"Hmm... Can you bake a cake?"

The fat guy looked around nervously. "...If you mean 'bake' as in microwave and 'cake' as in tv dinners, then...Yes..."

Riku grimaced. "Well, maybe you-LOOK A RABBIT!" He pointed in some random direction.

"WHERE?" the fat man looked in the direction he pointed in. "Hey, I don't see any..."

Riku was gone.

THE END

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A/N: So... as the big, bold letters said, The End. I might make a sequal called "Baking With Riku". Might. Maybe if you review... 


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